2/5 Chris W. 4 years ago on Google
Very
disappointing
experience,
our
first
time
in
Porfirios
and
definitely
our
last.
The
concept
-
upmarket
food
served
in
elegant
surroundings
-
is
completely
undermined
by
the
giant
screens
playing
inelegant
music
videos
at
a
volume
that
makes
conversation
impossible.
Do
I
really
want
to
eat
while
George
Michaels
"I
want
your
sex"
blares
out
around
me,
complete
with
20ft
high
close
ups
of
women's
backsides
towering
in
my
eyeline?
Does
anyone?
So,
the
atmosphere
is
catastrophically,
confusingly,
gormlessly,
tragically
misconstrued.
Classless
in
the
extreme.
What
about
the
food?
Here,
there
was
hope,
the
squash
flower
soup
was
ok,
the
quesadillas
included
in
the
(on
the
surface
decent
value)
executive
menu
were
good,
even.
The
house
red
was
good,
for
Mexico.
But
everything
fell
apart
with
the
main
course.
By
some
distance
the
worst
picaña
I
have
ever
eaten.
How
they
got
such
an
iconic
cut
so
wrong
is
beyond
me.
Google
picaña
and
you'll
find
thousands
of
sites
telling
you
exactly
how
to
prepare
it,
and
it's
pretty
foolproof.
What
you
don't
do
is
treat
it
like
other
steak
cuts,
or
you'll
ruin
it
fast.
Someone
should
tell
the
chefs
of
this
chain,
because
they
found
a
way
to
turn
it
dry,
tough,
with
a
bitter
burnt
crust
that
left
me
speechless
in
its
incompetence.
A
travesty
to
treat
a
fine
cut
this
way.
This
could
be
a
one
off
but
the
mole
they
serve
has
no
depth
whatsoever,
tastes
like
the
cheapest
Doña
Maria
from
a
supermarket.
So
two
mains,
zero
marks
This
is
not
a
serious
restaurant,
despite
the
serious
prices
they
charge.
They
care
more
for
the
theatre
than
the
taste
or
quality.
Esquites
are
served
from
twee
little
mini
trucks.
Meats
are
served
on
sizzling
skillets,
but
without
any
regard
for
the
extra
searing/cooking
they
will
thus
receive.
This
is
a
food
circus,
not
a
serious
restaurant,
gussied
up
in
fancy
threads.
A
schizophrenic
experience
that
just
left
me
confused,
annoyed
and
ultimately,
depressed.