Ok so here comes the honest review. Nothing less than 5 stars! You want meat? Thats what you get and nothing less. Awesome taste due to the open fire oven. Staff is great and location is good. There is a small catch though, watch out for the portions, they can be huge! It truly is a waste if they have to throw away the meat, especially considering the mindset of climate and food waste. Tip for the owner: mention estimated meat portion weight on next menu print so first time customers are aware. Go and eat here, quality wise you won't regret it!

Was recommended by a friend who told us to order the fillet steak and it will be the best steak you've ever eaten. Did not disappoint one bit, absolutely delicious. Add the friendly welcome and quality wine which all made for a great evening.

Best steak(s) I've ever eaten. Hands down. Gutted that I left it for my last night in Madeira. Everything incredible, couldn't recommend more. Obrigado!

Probably the greatest steak I’ve ever had. Perfectly cooked on their timber fueled bbq grill. Amazing service as well, super friendly staff with great recommendations and knowledge about the different steaks and wines. Especially popular among the locals - which is always a good sign. Not the finest location by the road, but who cares when the food is this good?! I surely do not.

The first time we came at 20:30, we were told that everything was busy and we needed to book a table in advance, we were offered to book for 21:30. We arrived at 21:30, and they told us we needed to wait a little longer, and at 22:00 they found us a table, brought us the menu at 22:05, made an order at 22:10, brought our order at 22:45. They didn't get it right when it came to roasting the meat. They made it closer to well done, we asked for medium rare. The meat was delicious, in the photo there is a T-bon and a portion of mixed meat for 2. Maybe we'll come again.

The service here was very fast, even at 9pm. The staff were so friendly and welcoming. The food and wine perfect! The meat cuts are a lot bigger then what you get for similar price in London. They took card payment. I will come back here :)

We had the very tasty Chirutzo starter, which was a decent size for me and my bf to share. Then I had the Fillet, which was cooked to perfection (chef's kiss). My Bf had the Ribeye, which was Devine. All round delicious and wonderful evening. Thank you La Vaca.

We had fantastic beef cutlets cooked over open flame. Terrific friendly staff and place is packed inside and outside with locals. Hope I can book to come again before return to UK.

By nature you will have a longer waiting period in such smaller restaurant BUT it was totally worth it. We started with some local bread bolo do caco which was freshly baked and tasted great. We tried also the empenadas, very cheesy and not oily at all. For maik we took a buger and T-bone steak grilled to perfection

Delicious food and great staff! We enjoyed the shared dish and it was awesome. Also the home made sauces were really good! Would totally recommend eating here.

We ordered a rib eye and a t-bone stake. The rib eye was tender, while the t bone was a bit more rigid. They all come with 3 options of sauce. I would recommend asking for a salad as a side dish. As for the atmosphere, the interior can become noisy, especially at peak times.

The best meat in all of Madeira! We took the plate for two people and it was huge! But it was heavenly tasty! The meat was sooo goood! The roasted potatoes as well! In the end we ordered one tart with cheese and they brought us two plates! So kind ! Sangria was also excellent!

Very good meat! The appetizer was amazing too

What can I say, just had one of the best meals we have ever had in Madeira! The guys at La Vaca Negra are great. Top quality food with amazing service, I wish all Madeira restaurants were like this. The fillet of beef was melt in the mouth and the t-bone was tremendous too, served with fries or jacket potato and side sauces it is all you need with your delicious meat. For us though it was the service that made it extra special, right from the moment we arrived the staff could not do enough for us, and all without being pushy, they tell you about the meat cuts and give great advice, and then they let you enjoy your meal hassle free. Honestly you guys were awesome! 🥩👍

We were told, that we have to take compromises when eating on Madeira. That the quality of the food often doesn't meet the standards we are used to. I can agree to this sentence for almost everything I ate during our trip - except of La Vaca Negra. Absolutely amazing food and great service

Amazing experience. Staff is very knowledgeable and helpful with all your needs. I appreciated the fact that 3 different people checked on us, including the owner to make sure all our needs are met and were very eager to know our feedback about the service and food. My experience was pleasant and would go back any time. The food and wine were exquisite and the bill box was surprisingly a cute touch.

We ordered empanadas and the mixed beef plate for two, and it was more than enough for two people (we had just hiked the PR1, so we were hungry too). The steak was perfectly cooked. We ate around 9:00pm on a Friday and had a very short wait.

Best steak we have eaten, the tommahawk steak is amazing. Would highly recommend

We savored the delicious flavors of our meal, enjoying both the empanada and the mixed grill for two. The staff was incredibly friendly and attentive. Although the restaurant's temperature was a bit warm, that doesn't stop me from giving it a 5-star rating!

Amazing experience all round. Firstly, would recommend that you book in advance as it can get very very busy even in what we thought was a quieter season. The steaks were fantastic and temperature was spot on. I won't deduct a star but some of the fat should have been caramelised a bit more as it was raw or chewy in some parts. But the steaks - we both ordered T-Bone steaks - were great. The portion size, the sauces, fries, and sweet potato were all fantastic, and so were the desserts. The staff were also attentive throughout the night and very friendly. Pricepoint was ok, but again slightly more caramelised fat would have completely justified it. Still great overall though!

Exceptional!!! Best beef I have tasted in Madeira or elsewhere. The food is delicious and comes with a side included in the price, the portions are big and the service is the best! The waiters were very attentive, asking if everything was OK, taking care we had everything we needed and the service was very fast despite the restaurant being full in the evening.

Great atmosphere, great food and service. Everything was top notch and spotlessly clean. Toilets are good too. Staff very friendly and helpful. Would recommend to any meat eaters. Will be back!!!

This is my favourite steak restaurant, and we always make sure to eat here several times each holiday. Amazing char grilled steaks, any cut you might want, perfectly cooked. Friendly service, great wines. Highly recommended.

One of the best steaks I’ve had. The tomahawk was incredible. The staff and customer service is even better. Will definitely come back next time I’m in Madeira!

Amazing food! We got lucky as we got the very last free table, all the others were reserved. If someone would like to eat here, a reservation is a must.

Always good so long as you're a meat eater!! My husband and I always have the mixed grill, which is three types of steak each, with either jacket potatoes or fries and a tasty salad.

Everything about this place is amazing . We saved it for our last night in Madeira seeing all the good reviews and we weren’t disappointed. The staff are so friendly and really attentive, the mojitos are amazing and the food WOW. Best steak we’ve ever had even compared to anywhere we’ve eat back in the UK. The prices are so affordable and you definitely get your moneys worth. We’ll be back when we’re next in Madeira ! Can’t recommend the place enough

I recently had the pleasure of dining at the steakhouse, and I can confidently say that it was an exceptional experience. From start to finish, everything was perfect, from the warm greeting at the door to the outstanding food and service. The star of the show was undoubtedly the steak. We ordered both the T-bone and sirloin, and they were cooked to perfection - juicy and tender with a mouth-watering flavor that left us wanting more. It was quite possibly one of the best steaks I've ever had, and I consider myself a bit of a steak connoisseur. Aside from the amazing food, the service was also top-notch. Our waiter was friendly, knowledgeable, and attentive without being intrusive, making sure that we had everything we needed throughout the meal. We felt well taken care of and appreciated the personal touch that he added to our dining experience. To top it off, the prices were very reasonable, especially considering the quality of the food and service. It's refreshing to find a restaurant that doesn't break the bank and still manages to deliver an exceptional dining experience. In summary, I highly recommend this steakhouse to anyone looking for an outstanding meal. The food was amazing, the service was great, and the prices were very reasonable. If you're a steak lover like me, you won't be disappointed - this place is a must-visit!

Everything we ordered tastes great. Love the chimcurrie sauce, and i like that in the mozzarella tomate they topped with carrot and sweet potatoe peel chrunched in the oven (no food waste at all) and tastes great together. Very friendly staff!

Great T-bone steak and wine recommended by the waiter, which is off the menu. Everything was tasty and I could honestly eat the same thing for the whole week. I also tried the dessert ricotta tart, definitely try it if you have space left! Would definitely come back again in the future.

UNREAL quality for a very reasonable price. We had the mixed grilled beef (a selection of fillet, rump and sirloin) steak, cooked/seasoned beautifully and served with amazing sauces (excellent chimichuri sauce and a homemade mayonnaise mixed with mustard and black pepper-incredible!). Very big portion sizes given the price! All sides delicious (chips, chorizo sausage and asparagus). Argentinan wine delicious and very reasonable. Amazing staff, efficient service-cannot recommend enough!

Delicious food, tender meat and perfectly cooked. Very nice staff, speaking English very well.

First class, well cooked food served by a friendly team of staff. One of the must visit restaurants in Funchal.

The best steak i have had in many years😍

I had the best time at this place. I came back and brought a friend because the food was so good and the service was fenomenal. The quality of the meat is very good. This restaurant made my vacation!

Wow😲 Definitely the place to go for a Massive.. Beautifully..Cooked...Buttery Steak 😋.. Regional bread with garlic for starter's...My wife had the Rib Eye 👌I choose the cutlet.. superb👌..Along with salad and chip's..2 glasses of red...66Euro 😲 Bargain... Service was spot on and the staff very accommodating 👌 Cheers guy's for a lovely evening x

Food was delicious! Had thr ribeye and a meat empanada. Worth a visit if you like a good steak!